The Moment Meditation Works - And Why We Ruin It

There’s a strange moment that happens in meditation. You’re still awake. Still conscious. But something inside you loosens its grip. The Moment the Mind Finally Lets Go One minute your head is loud - replaying conversations, rewriting the day, reminding you about the chicken you forgot to defrost. Then, quietly, something clicks. Not sleep. Not distraction. More like effort dissolving. Your body softens. Thoughts thin out. You’re not quite “here” anymore, but you’re not gone either. And for a brief, precious moment, you’re balanced in that in-between space where real internal change actually begins. And that is usually when the mind panics and slams the door shut again. This is the edge most people never realise they’re standing on. Why the Breakthrough State Never Lasts Lately, this has been showing up strongly in my own meditation practice, especially during deeper, Joe Dispenza-style visualisations. Just as that unlocked feeling begins - that whoosh, that sense of dropping beneath effort - the mind intervenes. Sometimes it interrupts with commentary. “Look! It’s happening!” Other times, it drifts so far that I resurface wondering why I’m suddenly dreaming about a donkey at a tea party. Both outcomes miss the point. Both break the spell. It’s like trying to walk a tightrope. Grip too hard and you wobble. Go completely limp and you fall. But somewhere between control and collapse is a state of soft, present awareness. You’re conscious, but not managing. Alert, but not efforting. This is where most people struggle - not because they aren’t capable, but because they are trying too hard to do it properly. The Subtle Skill Nobody Teaches Here is the piece that changes everything. When that floaty, expansive state begins to rise, the work is not to label it. Not to analyse it. Not to grab it and say, “Stay.” The moment you assess the state, you’re no longer in it. You’ve stepped out of experience and into commentary. The goal is not to be a perfect meditator. It is to become no-body, no-one, in no-time. That doesn’t happen while you’re mentally marking your own performance like a clipboard-wielding school inspector. If imagery appears - even strange, surreal, slightly unhinged imagery - let it. Stay conscious enough to know you’re witnessing something, but don’t yank yourself back into the room just because it feels odd. You’re not doing it wrong. You’re getting close. This is exactly the same pattern I see with clients inside the People Building work. Growth stalls not because the nervous system can’t change, but because the mind won’t stop supervising the process. This understanding is foundational in our coaching franchise model - sustainable change requires allowing states, not forcing them. You will fall out of awareness again and again. That isn’t failure - that is the practice itself. Letting the Door Stay Open It’s completely normal to dip in and out of that space. Awareness wobbles. Focus flickers. You climb back in, fall out, and return again. That repetition is not a mistake. It’s how regulation, healing, and emotional resilience are built. So next time you feel the safe unlock inside your mind, resist the urge to announce it. Don’t rush to celebrate. Don’t rush to correct. Let the door stay open. Let the space expand. Let the work happen quietly, beneath effort and beyond commentary. This is not just meditation advice. It’s a principle that runs through every effective piece of deep emotional change work - including the way we support clients through the People Building coaching franchise. Real change rarely looks impressive while it’s happening. Often, it looks strange. Disorientating. Even a bit donkey-at-a-tea-party weird. And that is usually how you know you’re close. by Gemma Bailey (with the help of Ai) https://www.peoplebuilding.co.uk/franchise